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Navigate: FAQ Home Page > Sexual Pleasure/Pain > Was it my fault?
First, if you said "I do not want to do this" or "no" at any time, even after lots of foreplay, the male should have stopped. If you did not express your thoughts, but just "checked out" he may not have known how you felt, as his own hormones had kicked in.
Second, even if there is no "fault," it is important that you realize how easy it is for those feelings to sweep you into sexuality, and make a decision that you are or are not ready to continue being sexual.
Finally, you can have the first experience you wanted with someone in the future - just remember to talk about expectations and feelings, and never be afraid to say what you feel and expect others to respect what you say.
Nancy Brown , Ed.S, M.A., Ph.D.