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Posted on: 03/29/2005
Question
I'm a senior. I have been very confused lately. It seems like each day that goes by I just get more frustrated. I don't understand why I've been feeling this way for almost seven or eight months. I feel sad like it's hard to be happy or something. I have been questioning myself a lot about if my feelings are "real". I think this is ridiculous of me and feel very guilty. I just feel like I don't like my life very much any more. I don't have very many friends. I have poor self esteem which makes it hard for me to talk to people. I have thought before I just wanted to die and told myself it was nothing serious. I would never do that because I would probably go to the bad place. I have bad nightmares of running away and my mom finding out a secret and says its depression and I'm relieved she doesn't know the truth. I have a learning disability and have struggled to accept myself. I'm different from my peers. I don't always understand things they say like sayings. I was with my friend and his two friends and they said something and the two girls were like, "oh my gosh, you don't know what that means like everyone knows what it means".
Answer
Senior year is often a difficult time for many kids as you plan for what's after high school and becoming more independent. It is even more difficult with a learning disability and social challenges. Friends change, school support changes and even family expectations change. It doesn't surprise me that you are having a rough time and probably somewhat depressed.
This is a time where you have to find the courage to ask for some help. You already took the first step by writing in here! Good places to start are with your Mom, a school counselor and/or your doctor. Learning disabilities don't mean you can't do well in life. You just have to find what you are good at and people who will like you for who you are. The right therapist or counselor can help you find the right path and not be set back when people pick on you or things don't go right. The worst thing to do is isolate yourself and worry all alone. So keep looking for you support team, keep asking questions and don't give up.
