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Navigate: FAQ Home Page > Depression > Getting over grief/old boyfriend
Posted on: 05/16/2006
Question
I'm 20 years old, and started dating a guy when I was 17 until recently last year. He was the only guy I ever loved, and I went through EVERYTHING, with him!! Now that we've broken up, I get depressed a lot. If someone even mentions his name I get upset. I dated one of my EX boyfriends after him, and I just compared everything he did, to what my 3 year ex put me through. I broke up with him, because of that. what should I do, when going into another relationship with someone, I can't help but judge and compare. please help!!
Answer
Three years is a long time to be in a relationship and especially at your age. Since you shared so much with this boyfriend he naturally became a huge part of your life. Give yourself adequate time to grieve this loss and understand better what went on in the relationship that can help you understand what you need for your future relationships. It is natural to compare the old boyfriend to the new, but since you broke up with him, it sounds like you have some things about what doesn't work. Sometimes it is best to be single for a while and give yourself time to process what happened instead of rushing right into another relationship.