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Navigate: FAQ Home Page > Depression > Gothic and sad
Posted on: 11/03/2006
Question
My old boyfriend broke up with me this June. When I asked him why he said that it wasn't me. I acted sad for about two days but have worn a fake smile ever since, when I do smile. Now I'm Gothic, I'm depressed, I'm confused and I want him back! I'm planning to call him and tell him that I still have feelings. Please tell me if I should do this, or at least tell me why he's not telling me his true feelings? On top of that I can't walk away and my need for him is getting worse.
Answer
If you are still feeling sad about your boyfriend after several months, it is a good idea to talk to someone--although probably not him. Your letter suggests that he has ended the relationship and has not tried to get back together, so you need to talk to someone who can help you figure out why you feel that you need him more rather than less. If being Goth is part of feeling that life in general is empty or hopeless, you should probably talk to an adult who can be helpful. Even if you don't want to talk to your parents in detail, you can let them know that you have been feeling sad for a long time and ask them to find you a counselor. If for some reason you are not comfortable talking to them at all, you could talk to a counselor at school or even a teacher that you trust. While it is certainly normal to feel sad after a breakup, continuing to feel unhappy and needy for months is not an experience you should have to manage on your own.