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Posted on:08/26/2008
Question
my parents got divorced when i was around 4. several years ago when i was in the 7th grade i moved in with my dad. he is bi-polar, an alcoholic, and at the time, was using cocaine. so of course it was not a good environment to live in. after living with him for a semester i moved back in with my mom. a few months later he moved to Alaska and blames me for it because i said i didn't want a relationship with him. (I never said that. I said i wanted to live with my mom again.) Although he is getting better in Alaska, drinking much less, no longer doing cocaine and taking less anti-psychotics, he's still difficult to have a relationship with because he's just so controlling. is there anything i can do to try to have a healthy, honest relationship with my dad?
Answer
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| I am sorry your life has had this struggle. It sounds like you have had counseling, so keep that up, and remember that his issues are his issues - not yours.
The best thing you can do - for both of you - is to take care of yourself, reach out when you can, defend yourself when he blames you for his unhappiness and remember that you are strong, good and loved.
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Answered By:
Nancy Brown
, Ed.S, M.A., Ph.D.
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