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Navigate: FAQ Home Page > Sexuality & Romance > Should we wait to have sex?
Posted on: 02/24/2009
Question
My girlfriend and I are 14 and we haven't been going out that long. I really like her. She has told me that she REALLY wants to have sex. She hasn't said with whom, but just that her body craves it. I really want to also but I've before made the mistake of having sex with someone that I didn't even care about. After we have been together longer, should we talk about the two of us having sex?
Answer
Wow! I wish I could give you a thoughtful human being award! I agree with you - that sex is better when you really care and have a relationship with someone which takes time to develop.
My personal opinion is actually that 14 is way too young to have any sexual contact and since a young female body is not even done developing at 14, she is more at risk for sexually transmitted infections. With sex comes pleasure, but also a lot of risk and responsibility. All sex, oral, vaginal and anal includes a risk for sexually transmitted infections (STDs), and vaginal sex adds the risk of pregnancy.
Once you are sure that you have feelings for a person, and you have discussed and know how to prevent the risks associated with STDs, then it would be time to go with her to have an exam and start a reliable method of birth control, purchase and learn how to use condoms, and then double check you are both ready - it is not something that should be taken lightly!
Good for you - keep thinking! There is so much more to life - please enjoy it!