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Navigate: FAQ Home Page > Puberty > Mom not letting me have independence
Posted on: 01/25/2010
Question
I am in seventh grade and I am in a new school (since September). Today, some of my friends (guys) asked me out to a café after school. I wanted to go so badly, but my mom is SO strict I know for certain she would NEVER let me go to a café with friends without an adult. I made up an excuse, but I'm scared them or someone else will ask me out again and I can't go. Also, my mom won't even let me have an e-mail account and most of the girls in my class think I'm weird because of it. Please help me!
Answer
I suggest a heart-to-heart with your mom. Tell her that you really want to talk with her about what will have to happen for you to have email and spend time with friends after school. If you get nowhere, tell her you would like to see a counselor to talk about some struggles you are having growing up. Then the counselor can meet with both of you and negotiate some "growing up" space. Remember to tell your mom you love her and that you will work with her to be safe!