The transition to middle school may be one of the toughest transitions during childhood, for both parents and kids. As you move through this period, remember to not cut your middle schooler loose quite yet. They are not really ready for the independence we give teens, and they need you to help them with this transition.

In general, it is common during the middle school years for kids to drastically change their effort or performance in school, be snuggly one minute and aloof the next, prefer peers to parents (at times), and to think that parents are completely out-of-touch with their reality.

It is perfectly normal for your child to be nervous about starting middle school. Not only are they facing a large group of peers whom they do not know, but they also may be exposed to bullying or teasing, and more peer pressure to conform to social norms.

On top of starting at a larger school, the academic workload gets harder in middle school and grading gets tougher. There is more homework and more long-term projects to organize, and usually less teacher-initiated contact with parents.

Below are some of the things that may make your child nervous. Try to discuss these things with your child and share your own experiences. You may even want to go to the school, map his or her classrooms, practice using the combination lock, talk to a staff member about the rules and try to alleviate some of the anxiety about each thing he or she is worried about.

• Getting lost or finding classes
  
• Opening the locker
  
• Getting good grades
  
• Being bullied or teased
  
• Making new friends
  
• Having more than one teacher
  
• Carrying around all those books
  
• Puberty (pimples, body changes)
  
• Changing before and after physical education (P.E.) class in front of other kids
  
• Having girlfriends or boyfriends
  
• Having someone to sit with at lunch

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