Changes and Finding Normal

Change happens to everyone. Whether it is good or bad, we have to adjust, and what matters most is how we adjust to that change. Fighting the change or pretending it did not happen usually creates more drama and conflict, but sometimes we just cannot help ourselves. Adjusting to change and finding a "new normal" is more productive and just feels better. On the "finding normal" pages, you can reading stories written by teens who experienced change.

Moving to a New Place

After living in Europe for seven years, my parents announced that my family and I would be moving to the United States. We all looked forward to this with great anticipation. What would people think of us? Who would be our new friends? I personally hoped to be the hero of the third grade class.

I was not disappointed. The third graders all thought highly of my experience, and I quickly became well known as "the French guy." I enjoyed my popularity for a time. However, I was not interested in many things my fellow classmates did, and it was hard for me to connect with them. I listened to classical music passionately, never watched TV, and rarely watched movies.

I did not have a common background with my friends because I grew up in Europe. I had few friends, and fewer good friends. In hindsight, I realize I was a bit of a jerk to many around me. I kept bragging about my quirks and thinking myself superior to those around me because I lived in Europe and they didn't.

I had decided I wanted better friends when my parents announced that we were going to move again! I saw this as the perfect opportunity to get better friends, where people did not know of my unkind, perhaps pretentious past.

When we moved to California, I did not flaunt myself, like I had done for five years. I did not tell everyone that I lived in Europe, and expected no reaction when I did tell my friends. I still listened to classical music, but I did not brag about not being main stream. I simply kept my music to myself. Nor did I try to become mainstream. Sure enough, I found that people enjoy the company of someone who is not typical but does not brag about it.

There's no substitute for good friends, and if I had to subdue my temper and pride, it was well worth the investment.

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