Divorce
Divorce is a tremendous time of change in your family that can bring out a lot of emotions inside you. Some teens experience feelings of anger, guilt, or sadness about their parents divorcing. They might feel like they are somehow to blame for their parents breaking up. It is important to remember that you are not to blame and parents divorce each other -- not you.
Other teens may feel a great sense of relief, especially if there was a lot of conflict and fighting between their parents. It is stressful to live in a house with fighting parents and divorce brings the potential of a positive change for the teen.
If your parents are divorcing you could be experiencing many emotions including a sense of sadness, relief, anger and happiness. Whatever you are feeling, remember to talk to other people. Lots of people have parents who are divorced, and you can get support from others who have experienced the things you are going through. You might also consider talking to counselors, other parents, clergy members and teachers who may be willing to listen to how you feel.
You may experience a variety of emotions for each difficult change that accompanies a divorce. Some of these changes may initially include having two households instead of one, observing conflict between your parents, having to switch schools, enduring the court and legal process and not seeing both parents every day. It is said that the first year after a divorce is often the hardest for all family members, but remember that things will settle down and it gets easier. However, if you find you are having trouble adjusting to your new life after your parents divorce, consider speaking with your physician. He or she can help you find a professional counselor to help you deal with your feelings.
Recommended Books
- The Divorce Helpbook for Teens by Cynthia MacGregor
- Making Your Way After Your Parents' Divorce: A Supportive Guide for Personal Growth by Lynn Cassella and Father Theodore Hesburgh
- Surviving Divorce: Teens Talk About What Hurts and What Helps by Trudi Strain Trueit
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Authors: SODAH student writers and Leigha Winters, college student writer
Additional PAMF Resources
Grief Support and Education Help Hotlines
Information for Preteens About Divorce
